Starting all over again

So maybe this job isn't working out for me the way I thought it would. My days are being cut in half. Sleep four hours, work nine, take a four hour nap, wait til' midnight, repeat. I have a serving position in mid-town Manhattan with a highly respected company, but that does not mean I am being treated fairly. I meet with my other server for the day in the mornings at 6:15 a.m. where they are either drunk, or crying like little babies about how early it is for them. Give me a break. It has been one month and I am tired of being treated like the "new guy." If you are looking for work, head over and take my position. The requirement is New York experience, and amateur at life. Because sub-sequently I do not meet their needs after all. So what have I done to change it? I went out today and handed my resume over at the Brooklyn Bowl. Turns out they are ALWAYS hiring. Hurray! Not to mention the hours are the typical hours any 25 year old would love to work. 5-2 a.m. and just in time for a few drinks afterwards. The gig seems more fit for my personality. Bowling, drinking, dancing, concerts, food, pretty girls, etc. Who knows. It's just another job just to get by. Just so I can be walked on more, talked down to by managers, and not commemorated for my hard work. Life is exciting.

The winter is getting colder. February is the worst month to get through. We're expecting another blizzard sometime tomorrow or Thursday morning so I was told. Also this blizzard should be worse than the first one we had right after Christmas, which made one of the top 5 worst snow storms in New York City. But the message that was relayed to me was from a friend who likes to over-exaggerate at any given moment. We'll see if we get some flurries. With the weather the city is slow. Not much is happening around New York this time of year. Unless you have some money to spend you're basically stuck in your home blogging in the middle of the night. There's your entertainment for the day. I really need some new excitement in my life.

School has been taking up a decent portion of my time. Statistics is pretty basic stuff so far. If you have good common sense then you should be able to handle this math. I can pick up the calculations pretty quick, but it's the online program that annoys me. If you miss one problem then you have to get through the rest of it just to start over and get full credit. My last math class. Just 3 more months. There are worse things.

Each day I continue to search for an opening into some sort of career for myself. My eyes are always open, and I talk to everyone I come into contact with. I'm tired of feeling lost. All my friends around me have some sort of position with a fancy title. I want to do something with myself that requires deep thought, time, and strategy. Enough with this filling up water glasses, clearing and setting down plates, yes and no sir's, and wiping asses. This is a joke to my life and my dignity. I was bitched out last weekend for not giving some asshole his pastry basket with his breakfast. That's because when you order toast, you don't get a pastry basket, fucker. Read the menu. I feel embarrassed.

One more day off tomorrow before another 5 days of wanting to kill myself. Plans - Walk around Prospect Park with a large cup of coffee and enjoy the minimal daylight we have here. Hit the gym while I can. Do some more homework. And then hang out with a cute girl who thinks I am too hard on myself. She's sweet.

I want to add that I am not depressed. I am really happy to be here and still figuring things out for myself. I am just not happy with my job nor the lack of money for what I put up with. Sure I was excited when I picked up the job because that was my first goal once I set foot in New York. Once you see it for what it is then you take what you learn and move forward. Find something better. One-up yourself. Maybe I'll take my friends advice and apply at the gay strip club.